Let me be your Turkey for the holidays!

Everyone is going home for the holidays to eat turkey with all the trimmings. Well I will be here waiting on you to stop by my place. I will be the only thing to eat on the table. I will be lunch and dessert, and I taste much better than turkey. You will be thankful for stopping by to taste my sweet pussy, and like turkey I will put you to sleep after I have drained you dry and filled you up.

I cant wait till you stop by to have some fun with me for the holidays. My cunt is ready right now to feed you full. Don’t keep me waiting till the next holiday, cum play with me now. If you make me wait I will have to just play by myself on the table for turkey day.

I’m sitting here waiting to be eaten, because I lick your lips delicious. You should stop by and treat yourself to my holiday dinner. Yummy I cant wait for you to visit.

Shyla Loves Married Men Phone Sex

 

I have been such a very naughty girl. I have been sneaking behind my neighbors back and secretly sleeping with her husband. I tried to be good. I really did but I just love playing with his big fat cock! I can not help it. I just love the things that he does to my tight young teen body. I like that he will sneak out of his house late in the night after his wife has gone to bed just to come sneak into my room and rip my clothes off. He just loves fucking my young cunt. He loves making me take all of his cock in my mouth. Making me suck him nice and fast., shoving his cock down my throat making me gag on it. Then pushing him all the way inside of my tight young cunt…The way my walls milk his cock for all of his cum… After he started fucking me he just stopped fucking his wife. I know it sucks for her but for me I love it. I get pounded daily now. I have all of my holes filled. I get all of his hot load shot deep inside my cunt and ass. Unless he’s feeling really spontaneous and cums in my mouth. Sometimes he likes watching me swallow his big yummy load. Even if what we are doing leads to a lot of sneaking around, I am going to keep on doing it because I can’t stop. I love getting secretly fucked by my married neighbor.

From Cigarettes to Cock

Today is the Great American Smokeout. It is a day that is designed to encourage people to quit smoking. I have been a smoker for decades. I have developed quite an addiction for cigarettes. I love smoking. As a submissive whore, many a master has not approved of my addiction and used me as a human ashtray in an attempt to break me, show dominance and hopefully create an aversion to smoking for me. But, as a pain slut, the feel of a cigarette being put out on my tongue, ass, tits, even clit, just made me want to smoke more. So, it has been increasingly harder to quit.

On the American Cancer Society’s web page they have tips for quitting. They even have characters for the type of quitter you want to be. Well, I know there is no way in hell I can be a cold turkey. I’m not that strong.  I decided I could be  “The Substitute.” This is someone who uses distraction and substitutions to help bust cravings. The ACS suggests creating new habits to curb one’s desire to smoke. For substitutes to smoking they suggest carrots, celery, candy, gum… Really? Like that is gonna work for a hard core smoker like me.

I decided my substitute would be cock. I was gonna swallow shafts to curb my addiction. If I was a pack a day smoker that means I need 12 cocks a day to suck to help me stop smoking. Luckily I love cum. I have sucked 6 cocks today so far. I picked up one at the coffee house; another at the gas station; one at the mall; and I hit the jackpot at the liquor store with a group of frat boys who wanted nothing more than to have their rods sucked by a hot MILF type. It is amazing how many guys are willing to help a gal out. All I have to say is, “I’m trying to stop smoking and I need something more healthy to put in my mouth, can you help me?” Guys just start pulling their cocks out to assist. So many guys want to help me stop smoking. Warms my heart, and my mouth!!

Turns out I love cum. Cum taste just as good if not better than nicotine. I think I can stop smoking if guys keep offering to help me. Would you help me? I am a very oral woman, obviously! I will shallow your shaft and your load. I have nice big tits to assist in milking that load out of you too. If I have a dozen cocks at least a day, I will be able to break my nasty smoking habit. Fill my belly up with cum and help stop my cravings. Instead of a human ashtray, I want to be a cum dump whore.

Such a Tease..

I fuck with a passion. I love to fuck. I have those men who whisper in my ear at the clubs and at the bars telling me they want to take me up to their rooms and make love to me. Sweetie, I am the best damn fuck you will never have. I like to play with these men who think they can make me cum harder than my toys. This one guy I came up to me at the pool. I was relaxing and enjoying the sun and my drink when he just shows up blocking my sun. He just wouldn’t stop. He told me he could make me cum 8 ways. I was interested but I knew better. 

I took him to my room, where I had him lay down on the bed. I tied his hands to the head board, and made sure he was real comfy. I turned on my favorite songs to fuck to and grabbed my big cock out of my suit case. I down in the chair in front of him and told him that he would never have anyone else like me so he needed to really watch me. 

I started to suck on my dildo like I would if it was his cock. I fucked my own mouth like it was a porn start mouth fucking one of his slutty costars. This nerd was so hard just by watching me get my dildo wet. What a sad little man. I laid back and started rubbing the tip of the big fake cock on my clit and pushing it in and out of my tight pussy. 

I watched him struggle as his cock got harder and harder as I fucked myself. Watching him like that made me cum even harder. When I finally made myself cum, I got up on the bed and got on top of him. He had a full view of my ass against his rock hard cock. I had no plans on ever fucking him, but I did want to make him cum. I rubbed his cock against my ass through his shorts until he came hard. 

I loved teasing him. I loved that I made him cum with out him even being inside of me. I’m sure he was like most men and wouldn’t be able to handle my pussy. They usually cum after a few times of being inside of me. Like I said I like to fuck, making love it for weak women. 

Fuckalicious Phone Sex Pussy Licking Lessons

I am loving this new escort job. I got a surprising call today – my business is almost exclusively men – but a girl called me and asked if I would help her learn how to be a good pussy licker for her new lesbian girlfriend. It didn;t take me long to decide – I told her I would be right over. I had no idea what to expect, and in fact I was expecting a less than sexy girl, but I still wanted to help, because everyone should know how to lick a good pussy.

To my pleasant surprise, when she answered the door, she was stunning. A hot ass little tight body, dark red hair and lips to die for. God damn, I couldn’t believe I was going to get paid to teach this hot ass lesbo how to lick cunt! She lead me into the bedroom, and I was shocked to see her girlfriend was also there. I thought it was going to just be the two of us, but this girl was hot as hell too, so there was no way I was leaving now. Introductions were made and I asked how I could help.

The redhead said she had just recently become a lesbian and her girlfriend is alaso inexperienced, so they wanted a pro to show them how to get each other off in the bedroom. My pussy was throbbing juts hearing her talk and looking at their smokin hot bodies. I told them we would start out slow, and go step by step. We began taking what remained of their clothes off, panties and such, and I got naked as well.

I told the girlfriend to lay back and spread her legs, and I held them in place. I showed the redhead how to rub her pussy and lick her clit at just the right time to drive her wild. She was a natural! I was only supposed to be there an hour, but I spent the day, and we licked and fingered each other so much that they were both experts by the time I was worn out!

Fuckalicious Phone Sex But ONLY if You Have a Fuckalicious Cock

You like fuckalicious pussy? Well you better have a fuckalicious cock if you want to have fuckalicious sex. You see Marissa and I are goddesses; pure perfection. Our pussies are worth the best cocks out there. Last night we were out for a girls night at this new upscale sex club. The kind of club that caters to sophisticated women and men. We were under the assumption that they only accepted men whose cocks were as big as their wallets. So when this very wealthy, very handsome man wanted Marissa and I for a threesome, we didn’t bother to verify the goods first. That was our bad.

We got into the executive suite and when he undressed, Marissa looked at me and we both roared with laughter at his nonexistent  package.  He looked dumbfounded. I informed him money cannot buy every thing. I do not care what you do for a living, what kind of car you drive, how much money is in your bank account. If you have a shrinky dink dick you cannot fuck me or Marissa. But you can sit on the sidelines rubbing your little nub as two hot bitches get each other off. Our clits were bigger than his pecker. That’s just sad.

Marissa is a hot bitch that could certainly please me better than our Mr. Short Stuff could. After a few minutes of watching us lick each other’s cunts, he pulled out his wallet and tossed money at us. He was begging us to let him in on the action. We looked at each other giggled and then looked at him and said , “No way loser.” We took his money though. Some men just don’t know their place. Just because you can provide for us financially does not  mean you can provide for us sexually.

Marissa and I had a blast tonguing each other’s holes while we laughed and made fun of our small dicked patron. The wealthy pin dicks are always the hardest ones to break too. They think money buys everything. No amount of money in the world is worth my sexual dissatisfaction, or Marissa’s. Since he was still balking at not being able to put his peanut in us, we played a little game with him. Made him think we had a momentary loss of standards. We dressed him in my panties, her bra and snapped a few pics of him. We put them up on showyourtinydick.com. The humiliating comments started  pouring in immediately and then he began to see the light, understand his place.

If you don’t know your place, Marissa or I would be happy to tell you. We are fuckalicious babes worthy of fuckalicious sex only and if you don’t measure up we will put you in your proper place. Life is short and likely so is your penis.

The Scent of a Woman

Normally my preferred choice for a bedroom companion is tall, dark and hung like a horse. But every now and then I enjoy some Sapphic love. There is something so sensual and sexy about fucking another woman, especially if that woman is a mature beauty like Rose. When I saw her at my spa last week, I got weak in the legs and moist between them. Rose is a far cry from a well hung black stud, but I wanted her nonetheless. I struck up a conversation with her, friended her on Facebook and worked up the courage to admit my girl crush.

Turns out Rose found me equally as lovely. She prefers young cock of the family kind if you know what I mean; but she was drawn to my body as I was hers. Two women in their sexual prime with rock hard bodies, what is not to love, right? I invited her over for brunch. I really did have intentions of feeding her more than my pussy, but from the moment she walked in I could think of nothing else but her body and how good it would feel to touch and taste.

Rose has a body better than any 20 year old. I kissed her as soon as she took off her coat. She was at my place for only one reason. The only thing she had on under her coat was a pretty pink corset, black thigh highs and black pumps. I couldn’t help but draw her in for a long, deep passionate kiss. My cunt was so wet just from feeling her tongue in my mouth. I slipped a finger into her pussy and she did the same to me. Finger fucking is a lost art form, but not for Rose. She finger banged me until I creamed all over her fingers. I hated to feel her fingers slide out of my cunt, but when she put one finger in her mouth to taste and the other in my mouth, I fell to my knees to worship her perfect pussy.

She came hard on my face. Her scent and taste were better than a 50 year old bottle of wine. I got on all fours for Rose. I felt her hands caressing my ass, her tongue rimming my asshole, her finger rubbing my clit. Didn’t take long to cum again all over her face. I returned the favor again by laying her down on my bed and licking her from head to toe. I used my favorite dildo on her tight snatch. I devoured every inch of her delectable flesh. The scent of a woman, the scent of Rose made me consider full on lesbianism. But, as good as she made me feel, as hot as her body was, I cannot give up big black dick; just like she can’t give up those young cocks.

Rose and I spent the entire day in bed. Worked up a great appetite for more than just each other. I love the way a black man owns me and fucks me so savagely, but not going to lie, the sensuality and softness of a woman, especially a mature beauty like Rose, is a welcum treat every now and again. Perhaps you would like to watch us, maybe even join us? Two mature gorgeous sluts could teach you a few things and drain your cock better than a bevy of coeds.

Yummy Breasts

I kept asking if you wanted me to cook for Thanksgiving and you always give me the same answer – all you want to eat is me because I am so beautiful… You are so sweet baby, but I really need to know if I need to plan a day for baking. I tried asking you again last night and you said no turkey could ever have breasts like mine…. abd of course we were banging one off before I could get you really answer me.

But it got me to thinking.. maybe I could make you a SEXY turkey for Thanksgiving. I mean they DO have breasts and I know you think I am crazy anyways, so I got one prepared and decided to cook it up and serve you something sexy and delicious (like me). I think I may have over done it, but I made you a turkey you can eat the breasts right off of and still fill up your tummy.

I cooked all day in the kitchen, naked of course, bending over the hot oven and basting everything just right.  I kept imagining you here with me and had to stop several times and rub my clit at the thought of how yummy you would tell me everything looked, and the wonderful reward I would get in the bedroom tonight. I am not the best in the kitchen, but I can bake a bird and have a sense of humor, so I hope you enjoy your turkey breasts 🙂

Turkey, Creampies and Booty for Thanksgiving

Things got a little wild in my kitchen last Thanksgiving. I am hardly a domesticated goddess. My husband did not marry me for my cooking skills. But, I did try to do a big traditional turkey dinner with the help of my stepsons. Well we were drinking as we attempted to cook, and my one step son said my ass reminded him of a turkey: big, plump and juicy. This lead to actually measuring my ass. I got a rump shaker that revivals Jo Lo’s booty. Forty two inches of fine ass.

My husband was getting turned on as he is obsessed with my big beautiful booty. I married my husband when I was really young, and now that I am in my 30s, he is in his 60s and well, he has major dick issues. I was feeling a bit mean that day. I bent over, told him to lick my ass and smell it. While his face was buried in my ass, I was sucking his sons’ cocks. Had them both in my mouth at the same time. They never have a problem getting hard or staying hard. And they can shoot bucket loads of cum.

Every woman in her 30s should be so lucky to have 2 able bodied step sons in the house. They don’t think much of their dear old daddy, so any way they can participate in his humiliation, they are game.  One of the boys started taunting him; telling him he was worthless because he had a hot wife he could not satisfy. The other one chimed in and said maybe he would have better luck with the turkey. My husband was drunk too. He started fucking that turkey. Slid his dick right into it and started thrusting like a horny teenager getting laid for the first time. It was pathetic. The closest thing to pussy he has had in a very long time.

Well, I had two able bodied boys right there. I got on the kitchen island and took one of them in my ass and the other in my cunt while I yelled humiliating things to my husband. I mean really? He was stuffing a turkey while I was getting double stuffed by two young cocks. They were clearly the men in the house. After they both came inside me, we made my husband clean up the creampies they left me. I mean pie is standard with Thanksgiving Dinner!

I can’t wait for this year’s Thanksgiving festivities. It’s rare that that the whole family gets together under one roof. Gonna plot more humiliating activities for my husband.

World Peace Day with Blair: GIve Piece a Chance

Today is World Peace today. And in a blonde moment, I thought it was World Piece Day. You know as in get a piece of ass. So, I put on a slutty outfit and went out to celebrate by giving out some tail. Now, I figured out my mistake pretty quickly. But I didn’t care. I thought I could still promote the day by making love not war. I was downtown when I spotted a group of international looking guys who were part of some peace day demonstration. To me, no better way to spread peace, than to spread my legs. Who wants to fight when they just got laid. When they just came? No one that’s who. What the world needs now is more fucking. Fucking leads to peace.

I got down on my knees, in midst of a group of guys and started unzipping pants. Another like minded whore decided to join me in spreading peace. Before long, there was quite a group of guys around us with their cocks out. I was a sucking machine. Took about 15 cocks down my throat. I will do anything to spread peace.  Of course, I could not just suck cocks, I had to spread piece also. I got on all fours for a World Peace Day gang bang celebration.  Those guys were all on board my peace train too. Cock after cock stuffed my ass, cunt and mouth. Felt so good to be spreading  harmony. The only violence going on was to my ass! And, that is my kind of violence. I love rough anal.

By the time I was done spreading peace, I was covered in cum.  A peace loving cum dumpster whore. I should be the international spokesperson for spreading peace.  Spreading peace, getting a piece–all has the same result-happy people. And happy people are not violent. So, if you are tired of the violence and the hate in this world, today, and every day, make love not war. Fucking is the best way to harmonious relations among us all. Give piece a chance, and peace will find us all.