I was visiting my friends down in Florida for the weekend, and they kept teasing me about alligators coming up into their backyard and pool. They recounted all kinds of horrendous stories. I didn’t want to believe them, but there were even more stories on the nightly news! My friends kept laughing, making chomping motions and saying that I was going to be “Gator Bait.” One of the guys had a particularly fun time because he attended the University of Florida.
One morning, I staggered out onto the lanai to drink my coffee. I screamed as I focused on the beast that was growling. There was a gator in the pool! My friends were struck with awe and seemed to dismiss my fear. One of my guy friends told me, “Dude, you have to take a picture with it. That’ll cure you.” I shook my head “No” but he kept on talking. He said that if I was naked, the alligator wouldn’t attack me. It didn’t sound right, and I wanted to flee inside the house. But, he sounded really convincing, telling me that (in all seriousness) his father had lived in Australia and had taught him how to handle these kinds of situations.
“C’mon, just take one picture and I’ll buy all of your drinks for the entire weekend and give you $100.” I wanted to tell him to fuck off, but I saw my friends eagerly rallying behind me and encouraging me. I don’t know why the hell I did it, but I pulled off my swimsuit and knelt down by the water. The gator seemed not to mind me at all. I was trying to be still, but my entire body was shaking! My friend snapped a picture, and then another. I hurriedly picked up my clothes and ran inside. I could hear the gator growl again and everyone laugh. Animal control arrived and took it away; I asked them about what my friend had said and they looked at me like I was stupid. “Hey, lady, he just wanted to see you naked,” one of them said. “But here you go, we found this. Take it as a souvenir.” It was a large sharp alligator tooth!
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