It is time to put away all the holiday decorations and start this new year. There in the corner of my closet I find this present. The paper it is wrapped in is to die for. I can’t stop laughing as I read the label that says “To: Zetta Love: Santa” Who put this here? Who could be my secret Santa? Who ever it is they sure have a sense of humor. I do the normal shake of the box trying to figure out what is inside. It takes me several minutes to come to the conclusion that I have no fucking clue what it could be. Honestly I am almost scared to open it. Judging from the wrapping it could be anything. Finally I take the box to my couch and sit down to open it. I am very cautious, going so slow and ready for something to jump out at me or something. I don’t know why I expect something to happen. Very gingerly I lift the lid and then I see it and I can’t stop laughing. Really? I have so many crazy friends any one of them could have done this. The little note says “take good care of this and use it wisely” If any one was looking at me at this moment they would think I was slap ass crazy. Laughing hysterically starring into this box. It is a ten inch black strap on. The one thing I don’t need is another dick! Thanks to who ever left this for me, you made my day! 
Zetta
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